Je ne regrette rien *slight adult content*

Brandin worked for Circuit City when it went under and the stress of him being "off work" took it's toll on our relationship... the best way i can explain it is... here lets see if you can track with me "when i was a kid i remember going to a birthday party for my cousin, it was a pool party but i remember sneaking in the house with my cousin and eating the whole underside of the cake, when it was time to cut the cake, the knife went through and half the cake toppled over" that in a way is what's going on with Brandin and I, through out the last couple of years things have been thrown our way, hurts have been made, and poor choices have been a constant, but he was working all the time, and i had Ethan (then to our surprise Abigail) so things got pushed farther and farther under the proverbial carpet, when he lost his job, we spent every waking moment with each other... every... waking... moment... and we were forced to really look at our life and take a stand... take back control so to speak... i realized i loved him, i loved him for being Ethan and Abby's daddy, i loved him because we had been together for so long, i loved him for being my first... everything, i loved him for being a good friend... but being in love was completely different... we weren't passionate anymore, we weren't lovers, we had sex as a physical necessity.... just a need that was met. there was no "i love this man, and want to be connected with him" it was just.... it's been awhile... he didn't like it at first, but i think he's getting used to the idea, we were meant for each other for a season, we made allot of choices, grew up, had set backs, leaned on each other, figured it out, came to blows, yelled, kissed, loved, hated... you name it we experienced it, and i can't regret it. i can't regret him, but your first love isn't always your true love. i wouldn't be the woman i am today without him, i wouldn't have been forced to grow up without him (in a good way) there are allot of things i wouldn't be without him, and i'm grateful. "Je ne Regrette Rien"